Favourite lines from the show

Serenade for Tight Jeans and metal Detector
Compo "Nigel Hinchcliffe's nose has turned septic."
Clegg "What all of it or just the bit that sticks out."
 
Keeping Britain Tidy
Clegg "Why do we have to be filled with blood?Why can't we be filled with a lightly scented powder?"
 
I don't know whether this should go in the "Favorite Lines" thread or "Favorite Scenes" thread, but I watched "Lipstick and Other Problems" and I have to say towards the end of the episode there are several funny lines and moments where I laughed. Most of the time there are visuals that go along with the lines that make them so great...

(Compo holds up his index finger for the lipstick)
Truly: Ugh.. Ye gods, where has this been? Where have you had this finger?
Compo: I've the slighted idea. Fingers get about.
Truly: This one was.. Give me another finger.
(Compo switches with his middle finger)
Truly: They're all the same!
Compo: Ay, where one goes... (Compo lifts his index finger making the V sign) ..the other goes.
Truly: Point taken.

---

(the trio are pushing the motorbike up in the hills over town)

Compo: This big dillup made it worse..
Truly: I was trying to explain to them that I was Truly of the Yard, wasn't my fault he thought I said Trudy.
Compo: Trudy of the Yard! Ooh, I like it!

---

Clegg: Norman Clegg, they'll say.. Ran off to be a bag lady!


LOL
 
The mystical squeak of Howards bicycle
Billy "I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night itching for adventure."
Clegg "Have you tried camomile lotion,it might be too many blankets."
 
Glenda "My Barry's very pleased with his bifocals."
Edie "Nobody's interested in your husband's muscles."
 
Small Tune on a Penny Wassal
Edgar 'They're great in here....they're even going to change me glasses."
Compo "What they gonna give you for em?"
Edgar "Another pair of glasses you silly beggar."
Compo 'You've already had them ask them for an x-ray machine."
 
Enter The Phantom
After the trio climb to the top of a hill.
Clegg "Don't tell me we've come all this way and God's not in."
 
The mysterious feet of Nora Batty
Compo has just blown a raspberry at Foggy
Clegg "Was your family always musical?"
Comp "Me mam had legs like a grand piano."
 
Compo "I missed my wedding night."
Truly "How did you miss your own wedding night?"
Compo "We had to carry a drunk home."
Clegg "Who was it?"
Compo "Me."
 
Pole Star

Compo: I bet if I were naked I'd look like a black pudding in wellies..
Foggy: What a terrible thought!
Clegg: ....I was going to have a sausage roll, but I feel a lot better now.
 
Potts in Pole Position

Delphi: I say! You there, fishing chappy!
Marina: Chappy? I may not be sixteen anymore, but I have nothing that wobbles in a masculine manner..
Delphi: Oh! I didn't realize you were a tart.

LOL :D
 
I have so many that it would take me hours to write them all down.

Edie was one of my favourite characters of the whole series, some of the lines between her and Glenda at the coffee mornings were priceless.

Ivy: "Sometimes separate beds work"
Glenda " I don't want separate beds, my Barry's wonderfully comforting under the duvet"
Edie:"Ooh, hang your coat up" - followed by embarrassed laugh

Glenda: "My Barry's learning French"
Edie (spluttering in her coffee) "Well that wants stopping for a start"
Nora: "Well it's better than some of the language him next door to me has learnt"

Glenda: "My Barry likes tropical fish, the one he finds fascinating is the mouth-breeder)
Edie(once again spluttering): "Have you no shame girl?"


Stop that castle:
When the boys go to Auntie's for the castle.

Foggy. "We were wondering if we could borrow your bouncy castle?"
Auntie. "Well of course you can borrow it, £35 pound a day, blowing-ups extra"
Foggy "But it's for charity madam!"
Auntie "Oh, go on then, £34, but I don't deliver, not at them prices"


The Empire That Foggy Nearly Built:
Foggy (looking around the multi storey car park) "Look at that, not a vacant space"
Compo (looks at Foggy and pokes the side of his head) "Oh, I wouldn't say that"

Dancing Feet:
Compo: "What happened to her mother?"
Seymour: "She died"
Compo: "Well she needn't have lost by that margin"

All mod conned: Clegg and Foggy discussing Compo's 'suit'

Foggy: "We could cover him up with something"
Clegg: "Like what?"
Foggy: "Well, six feet of earth springs to mind"
 
The Mystical Squeak of Howard's Bicycle

Truly: Tell me Billy.. You had one finger in this ear *puts finger in left ear*, and one finger in the other ear... *puts finger in right ear* Did they meet in the middle? *bends both fingers as if they went in deep*
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top