Taters and mash.

Peripheral

Dedicated Member
I was sat here wondering what to write about when an idea sprang into my mind. Why not? I said to myself. Just an idea. If you would like to see more let me know and I will try and add to it.


Taters and Mash.

Main characters are,

Ted Armison, Trevor Earnshaw, Roy Simpson........ Madge Atkinson, Shiela Harris.

Madge Atkinson was on her usual Monday morning routine of calling on her friend Sheila Harris. Depending on the weather they would either go shopping or take a short country walk. Both being elderly they decided that today, being such a beautiful sunny morning, was ideal for a walk.
"Would you like a cup of tea?" Sheila asked, "before we set off?"
"No thanks" replied Madge, "not if we are going for a walk. You know how quick it goes through us and I hate squatting down behind bushes. You know what happened last time we did that, that lorry driver came down the lane and sounded his horn. I had to throw my slacks away".
They set off on their walk, both thinking of what would be a good topic of conversation.
"I've had a letter this morning from Janet in Spain. Her daughter is expecting again," said Madge.
"Expecting"? queried Sheila. "Expecting what"?
"A baby," replied Madge and, at the same time, curving her hand in front of her stomach to indicate a swelling.
"Crikey", retorted Sheila, "how many has she got now?"
"Six", replied Madge, "five boys and a girl so she has her fingers crossed that this one is a girl".
"Fingers crossed?" exclaimed Sheila, "Sounds to me like she should have her legs crossed!".
They progressed steadily down the lane.
"Oh no," exclaimed Madge, "look who's walking across the field."
"Who?" asked Sheila.
"It's them three Herberts who live near the pub," said Madge," Tom Dick and Harry".

"Don't you mean Tom Dick and Harriet?" queried Sheila, "one of them is a bit doubtful"
"Well, he wasn't doubtful with me the other night in the pub on Quiz Night. He was definitely a member of the RHS. It's the strong aftershave he uses that started all the talk"
"The RHS?" asked Sheila.
"The Roaming Hand Society," said Madge, a big scowl on her face. "OH NO, they are coming to talk to us."
"Can't we pretend we haven't seen them?" said Sheila.
"We could I suppose," said Madge, "but we can't pretend we didn't smell Roy Simpson with his aftershave."
"Good Morning girls," called out Trevor Earnshaw, "you off on your MMM are you?"
Sheila looking bewildered asked, "MMM, what's that mean?"
"He means your Monday Morning Meander" chipped in Ted Armison, "you usually go for a meander on Monday mornings."
"It's streams that meander," snapped Madge scowling at them.
"Yes, we've noticed streams meandering when you've been behind the bushes," said Roy.
"OH GO AWAY," yelled Sheila, "we do not wish to be seen associating with the likes of you. It's bad for our image. What are you doing down here anyway?"
 
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