[ directly plagiarised from Pete and Dud's Greta Garbo sketch]
I once wrote a collection of children's stories about a hedgehog called Spike, 29 to be precise. I bought a book about publishing and followed the instructions in detail. This included having to send a letter of introduction to a likely publisher. I did everything as instructed. A few months later I got a reply from my preferred publisher which informed me that my stories lacked action and that they would be returned to me. I was very surprised to receive that letter because I hadn't sent them any stories. I had only sent my introductory letter. I was, to say the least, disgusted. J.K. Rowling sent her Harry Potter stories to 100 publishers before she was accepted. I wasn't about to follow with a long line of would-be publishers. I am somewhat lacking in patience. I'm too old to try again.We thank you Peri for your Tall Tales and Shaggy Dog stories , you should publish them all in a book whilst you are in lockdown, make a change from rejecting amorous advances from Marina scaling the drainpipe to reach you !
Me with unkempt hair? Let me think. .......??????????? Yeah, I remember. Was it the first pic or the second pic?
The first picture, the second one is of a radish!
H A R O L D, some geezer is groping me. What shall I do?Don't take this the wrong way Peri but picture one bears an uncanny resemblance to Gladys Steptoe the fictional wife of Albert in Live Now , PAYE later.
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Good guess Dick. Actually, that photo was taken after Victoria had dosed my hair with iron filings for alopecia and then stuck a magnet on the ceiling.Was No2 when Mohican's were in fashion ??
