Funny typos, speakos and whatever-collection

toodlepip

toodlepip

Dedicated Member
Barmpot gave me the idea to open a thread like this, I think we should collect the funny things we say or type, slips of the tongue or just general mishaps.
As I said in his thread already, I´m prone to spoonerisms in English (not in German, funnily enough, but English is much more worthwhile anyway because the words still make some sense very often), such as
"I´ll shut down and sit up" or "on your bay to wed".
 
In a very posh pub I asked for a liger and lam

My mum once said people would form a group of village aunties.
 
Speaking of pubs, I once asked for a baby and brandycham!

My dad used to sing along to the early Rolling Stones version of Walking the Dog .
He sang it as Wopping the Dog ( cant listen to the song anymore without smiling ;))
 
I once called my wife Karen instead of Sharon with rather obvious problems ensuing. Took me ages to blag my way out of that. i speak rather fast so make regular mistakes but the wife just talks nonsense i.e ' i'm getting the bus to town because i've just missed the bus' is one example.
She's had many 'blonde' moments, just need to remember them.
 
I had a friend who used to come out with some gems.Sadly he passed away a few years ago from cancer.

Did you see the torryental rain last night?(torrential) ;D
The metraphorical office is giving odds of 3/1 that it will snow at Xmas(Metrological) ;
I cant remember any more at the moment

Hector
 
When I was a child we didn't have a tv so we would watch at a neighbours house.I would go round and ask if I could watch the Buccaneers except I didn't say it with a b.
I could never understand why they laughed at me and consistantly asked me what my favourite programme was.
 
LOL, great replies! Though I don´t get all of these, could you please also give us the correct version for barmpots like me who don´t get all of these things in English?

I once stated: "Your toad is getting kite!" (coat getting tight)
 
**** said:
... for barmpots like me who don´t get all of these things in English?

I once stated: "Your toad is getting kite!" (coat getting tight)
Click to expand...

I would never call you a barmpot, from the quality of your posts - you are tah clue fever (whoops far too clever!)


The spirit ofo the Rev'd Archibald Spooner lives on ...
 
When I was a kid I knew somebody who called pop lemonade.He would ask for a bottle of lemonade please,Dandelion and Burdock
 
LOL, today I got an email saying something like "I like planets in my room, but don´t know which ones to get. Do you have any?" ;)
 
;D We mustnt forget Compo's speako's such as ....

Ormeroyds, me uncle Perce suffered with em for years!

I've got this haricot vein just ere! ::) ;)
 
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