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Destiny And Six Bananas.

Car polish

I like it, but I'd have the blue one.

Hand painted army office door signs.

Helen Turaya

Finkle Street

I keep getting the urge to purchase a big white bear from the Arctic, my doctor says I may have 'Buy Polar' disorder.

Bullocks

Marti Pellow has discovered he's got Arthritis, he feels it in his fingers, he feels it in his toes.

How old is that photo? By the look of the loco and carriages, I'd say 1960s.

I've just been informed that a distant relative has left me a priceless watch in her will, I hope it's not a wind up.

Mervyn Would Be Proud

A man was arrested for stealing helium balloons, the police held him for a while then let him go.

Yours Truly If You're Not Careful.

Auntie handed over change to Miss Davenport after selling her a car tyre foot pump. I think it was in An Apple A Day.

SeX is something precious that you should do with the lights out without ever getting excited about it.

I could barely lift my bottle of water earlier, it was an Evian.

The Really Masculine PURSE

Norris Fairburn

I live in Scotland but I was born down south in Wokingham where I lived for 4 years. We then moved to the midlands and had two houses in Rugby. When I started work my parents decided to move back down south so I bought my first house in Coventry. I married a Scottish lady and we moved up to...