Windy ain't it!

Peripheral

Peripheral

Dedicated Member
Today is going to be an obstenticulous day. I will start by collecting the bits of our roof which have been relocated to various parts of South York's due to the high wind.
"There's a hell of a strong wind tonight dear," I said to my wife to which she replied, "Yeah, and there's a hell of a gale outside as well. You really must cut down on the beans and cabbage souffle ".
It was a really bad night. Twice I woke up on top of the church steeple with the weather cock giving me the ultimate in discomfort due to where it had impinged itself on my anatomy. The fire brigade assisted me to ground level where a very kind dear old lady from the Darby and Joan club lent me her bloomers to cover my predicament because my trousers were still caught up on the weather vane. When my roof is relocated I will contact Amazon to see what they have in Ground Positioning Systems for wigs. Anybody got a used hair-piece they want to sell? :rolleyes:.
 
After yesterday's post I feel like a Scouse Michael Fish !!!...
Windy ?...windy ?......it is so bad here on the docks that we have had to suspend all vessel discharges,because the material that is in the grab of the cranes is getting blown towards the Irish Sea...instead of the wagons.
Unfortunately I have big ears,and I resemble a wingnut in the semi dark....so a big gust of wind I could end up flying like Dumbo....and landing in The Isle Of Man !!!.
x!
 
MOODYBLUE said:
Unfortunately I have big ears,and I resemble a wingnut
Click to expand...
Your head must be spinning in this weather with all that is going on Keith ;)

Definitely a day for those of an older disposition to go head on into the wind , take a selfie and send it to your friends . A wind assisted face lift takes years of you though you have to be careful where to position the camera what with all that skin flapping behind your head . Just sit back and accept all the admiring comments from Friends about how young you look.
 
It's been so windy here that you don't need to worry about droppings from birds overhead, but do need to keep an eye out for those a couple of hundred metres upwind.
 
I put my shorts on today at work. The Landscape Gardeners Law now states that they must stay on until Winter. Last year I got right through to the end of December but got defeated by the January snow. Looks like a nice day ahead tomorrow.
 
ferret said:
I put my shorts on today at work. The Landscape Gardeners Law now states that they must stay on until Winter. Last year I got right through to the end of December but got defeated by the January snow. Looks like a nice day ahead tomorrow.
Click to expand...
ERR, how deep was the snow? :eek2:
 
IF only you had tried to master some of those old circus skills as something to get through the Pandemic lockdown you could of worn the shorts a lot longer . No not lion taming , cracking a whip wont stop it snowing or keep it from the door , juggling three balls doesn't prepare you to juggle every hailstone that falls there's just too many but had you taken up stilt walking you could have risen above the snow level . Whatever the depth there are surely a pair of stilts to allow you to rise above the snow depth ;)
 
captain clutterbuck said:
IF only you had tried to master some of those old circus skills as something to get through the Pandemic lockdown you could of worn the shorts a lot longer . No not lion taming , cracking a whip wont stop it snowing or keep it from the door , juggling three balls doesn't prepare you to juggle every hailstone that falls there's just too many but had you taken up stilt walking you could have risen above the snow level . Whatever the depth there are surely a pair of stilts to allow you to rise above the snow depth ;)
Click to expand...
Walking in snow on stilts is not to be recommended Captain. I once tried it and when I came to an obstacle I looked down to see which leg to move in order to negotiate the aforementioned. That is when I became very confused. I only remember attaching two stilts. Like Syd I was nonplussed . Completely nonplussed. I like that word, nonplussed. There I've said it again. I stood there in the ever deepening snow trying to figure out where my third leg had come from. Suddenly, I became aware from whence the extra leg had appeared. I had intended using my shepherds six foot long crook when I decided to go out. When I realized how deep the snow was I hung it round my neck while I attached my stilts. Now you know from whence came my third leg. A silly thing like a wal...??? What was that you said? You thought that, OH really. how could you think that? I mean, how could my stilts have mated and produced a baby stilt? o_O
 
Peripheral said:
Walking in snow on stilts
Click to expand...

Stilt walking is not only a fair weather sport Peri , we can't all go Katrina and the Waves and constantly be Walking on Sunshine . Stilts aren't only for Christmas and stilts in the snow are far more likely in January to March , I am still regretting all those huge bets on White Christmas . IF stilts don't float your boat then its back to platform shoes for you .
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top